You Go First
What you're about to learn is arguably the most important behavior you can master.
When conversing with another human, you alter their emotional states. That's the nature of human-to-human communication. Therefore, it's crucial that you are cognitive of the emotional states you are eliciting — especially if you want others to like you.
For example, you will likely drive your conversation partner away if you elicit negative emotional states. Even worse, they will tend to link you to negative emotional states and avoid you. Likewise, they will tend to be drawn to you if you elicit positive emotional states.
But eliciting emotional states, positive or negative, isn't just about saying the right words, doing the right things, and having the best intentions.
To master the art of creating an emotional state in another human, you must first create the emotional state within yourself.
When you develop rapport with someone, you become synced with them. This is commonly expressed when someone in a group yawns and others begin to yawn as well. Humans will even say, "Stop yawning! You're making ME yawn!"
When I lead others into hypnosis, I go first.
In other words, I begin to narrow my focus to a single point, turn my attention inward, and occupy my conscious mind with the task of watching the progress of my subject.
Because I have rapport with my subject, they follow me into trance. My breathing rate slows, I relax, my voice deepens and becomes softer, and we enter trance together.
Imagine you're with someone you care about and would like to set the mood for a romantic evening. You must create a storm of emotional states within yourself to lead your partner down a similar path.
Perhaps you create within yourself emotional states of deep love, wanton desire, intense attraction, adventure, heightened sensations, and excitement.
In other words, you are mixing the cocktail for romance and being turned on.
(Creating emotional states can be the most fun skill to master and practice.)
Practice putting yourself into different emotional states. The more you practice, the faster and more associated you will become going in and out of emotional states. (NOTE: "Associated" means fully feeling the emotional state.)
When you have a few emotional states that you can quickly enter, practice going into these emotional states when you are with another human and pay attention to how they react.
Make others feel important and great, and they will reciprocate.
